In a candid interview with Vanity Fair, director Joel Souza has revealed his harrowing experience during the tragic shooting incident on the set of the film "Rust" in October 2021. Souza, who was injured in the incident that resulted in the death of cinematographer Halyna Hutchins, spoke about his thoughts after being shot, his decision to complete the film, and the strained relationship with star Alec Baldwin.

Reflecting on the shooting, Souza described the surreal feeling of being shot while standing behind Hutchins, directing a scene. Recalling the moment, he said, "It's bizarre to have been shot... And then, who was holding the gun? That's bizarre." Despite the shock and pain, Souza mustered the strength to continue, drawing on a childhood movie memory. He added, "It's like your older self whispers to your younger self, 'Hey, that guy... someday...'"

The impact of the gun firing left Souza with a numbness that coexisted with excruciating pain. He likened the sensation to being kicked by a horse or struck with a bat. Souza acknowledged that the bullet came dangerously close to vital organs and the spine, resulting in a bulging bump on his skin. However, when questioned about feeling grateful to be alive, he candidly admitted, "No, I wasn't," revealing the emotional toll the incident had on him.

The aftermath of the shooting led to a series of legal proceedings. First assistant director Dave Halls reached a plea bargain for a misdemeanor charge, while armorer Hannah Gutierrez-Reed was convicted of involuntary manslaughter and will serve 18 months in prison. Baldwin's involuntary manslaughter case was dismissed due to withheld evidence. When asked if he believed justice had been served, Souza expressed uncertainty, highlighting the complexity of the situation and the absence of satisfaction in seeing someone imprisoned.

Regarding Baldwin's involvement, Souza acknowledged both sides of the argument surrounding the charges of involuntary manslaughter. He admitted that others have debated whether Baldwin's actions demonstrated negligence or whether it was a matter of common sense. Souza abstained from offering an opinion, emphasizing that the charges were filed and it was ultimately the decision of the authorities.

Despite the tragedy that unfolded, Souza made the difficult choice to return to the set and complete the film. Initially resistant, he eventually understood the importance of preserving Hutchins' legacy and supporting her family financially. A new cinematographer from Hutchins' circle, Biana Cline, took over, and the scene connected to the fatal incident was entirely reimagined and eliminated from the film. Souza emphasized that the focus should be on recognizing Hutchins' talent rather than the tragedy that claimed her life.

Reflecting on his relationship with Baldwin during the subsequent shoot, Souza acknowledged that getting through it was challenging. While he managed to achieve the desired performance, he stated, "We're not friends. We're not enemies. There's no relationship." Baldwin's representatives did not immediately respond to comment.

Contrary to some reports, Souza clarified that "Rust" has been finished since March but has not yet been presented to distributors. When the film eventually reaches audiences, Souza hopes that the viewers' main takeaway will be Hutchins' exceptional talent rather than the tragedy that cut her promising career short.

The full interview with Joel Souza can be found on Vanity Fair's website, shedding light on the emotional journey of those impacted by the Rust shooting and the process of completing the film amidst immense challenges.